If you’re one of the few people who avidly keep up with all my posts, you might have noticed a change in content this past week. After months of contemplation, I am no longer a lifestyle blog. And it oddly feels like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders.
I focused mainly on fashion, but my posts were always all over the place. I was trying to do too many things. In retrospect, that’s kind of what a lifestyle blog is, or can be, but it just wasn’t me. I spent a year posting outfits and makeup tutorials and things of that nature before I realized I’m not even that good at this. No, actually I realized it after a few months, but I had this idea in my head that since I enjoy fashion/beauty/etc. that it’s what I should be writing about. Very quickly did I also start adding creative writing posts because they felt more like me, like a good balance.
I have a newfound respect for all the lifestyle, fashion, and beauty bloggers out there. To anyone who considers it easy work, you have no idea how hard it is. If you do it correctly, it requires a whole lot of time, thought, and money. None of which I was completely willing to put in because it wasn’t what I was most passionate about and I knew it. It showed. I no longer had a voice. I didn’t know what to say about it anymore. I didn’t want to put the effort into my photos anymore. I didn’t take days to edit posts like I used to. Fashion became an afterthought.
Don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t mean I love fashion any less or that I’m suddenly going to start dressing in sweatpants and no makeup everyday, because that has definitely never been my style and never will be. I respect the girls who can do that and still look fantastic, but I’d look like I just rolled out of bed. However, just because I enjoy something does not mean I have to dedicate my life (or at least my free time) to it.
That being said, now that I am no longer a lifestyle blog, I’m focusing on what I was meant to do from the beginning: creative writing. Mainly, poetry. I’ve kept categories for things like book reviews, story writing, etc. (which I will absolutely keep up with) but poetry is the heart of this blog.
I fell in love with poetry a couple years ago. I wrote it on occasion, went from absolutely hating it to falling head over heels in love with it, but there was a defining moment in which I thought I could do this forever.
I was killing time between classes, sitting outside my school cafeteria (or, The Caf if you were cool…I was not) and watching these tiny finches fluttering around my feet. They made me this kind of happy that was hard to explain, but I didn’t want to forget. To a girl with almost no friends and having a particularly lonely Monday, it felt reassuring that something, even if it was just a few birds, wanted to be in my company. I wanted to capture that exact feeling, so I wrote a poem. It kind of sucked, but hey it was my first real try at it. I wrote three more in that hour sitting there.
I later called my then-boyfriend and read him what I wrote. The silly one inspired by my pet gerbils made him laugh a lot, and I liked that. He told me I should stick with it, and I did. I never stopped after that.
It became like therapy to me. More than that, it became an extension of myself. I became Gabby, the girl who writes poetry rather than Gabby, the girl who likes clothes or Gabby, the quiet girl.
Two years later, I still write poetry every day. It’s constantly on my mind. I experience things and immediately wonder how I can transform the moment into words. I always say that it doesn’t matter what I go through because at least I’ll get some good writing material from it. It forces me to look at the world around me, my experiences, from all perspectives and to look closer because there’s always more to see.
So, that’s why my blog suddenly changed, in case you were wondering. If you’ve actually read this far, leave a comment! Let me know what you think, if you’ve ever drastically switched paths like this before, whatever. For someone as shy as I am, I love talking to people, so don’t hesitate. That goes for any and all of my posts.
Thanks for reading!