Tell Her Something True

She doesn’t want your broken promises.

Do you think she stays because she doesn’t know any better?

Please, give her more credit than that.

You like her because she’s smart, right?

That’s what you tell her every time she dreams aloud and you don’t know how to reply.

You think she has just enough naivety in her to fall for the fairytales you throw together.

Do you honestly believe that you can outwit a girl like her?

She fabricates stories for a living.

She weaves her words and thoughts and ideas together like poetry.

No, she stays despite knowing exactly what’s going on in your heart.

She can read into your every move, your every action and word you choose to speak.

She knows what you really mean even before you do.

All she’s doing is waiting for you to speak up.

You’ll fight her, pretending you don’t know why in the world she is so upset…again.

You might go so far as to call her crazy when you’re out drunk with your friends.

But you know the truth, don’t you?

Dig a little deeper.

Break down that manly exterior you’ve built around your shattering body.

Just this once, tell her something true.

Don’t feed her what she wants to hear.

She can see through such simple deception.

She wants something real.

Even if it breaks her, she wants it.

It won’t hurt more than knowing you can never be straightforward with her.

After all this, all you’ve been through, all the chances she gave you?

The truth is hanging over her head on a delicate string that’s nearly worn out by now.

Then finally you take her hand, look into her hopeful eyes, and make a choice.

The string breaks.

Your truth is coming down on her one way or another, so she simply lets it happen.

She collapses under the weight of what you’ve done.

She’s finished.


 

Song: Look Her In The Eye And Lie – Alan Jackson

 

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Quote #4

“Content thyself to be obscurely good.

When vice prevails, and impious men bear sway,

The post of honor is a private station.”

– Joseph Addison (Cato, 1713)

5/22/17: Really, Everything’s Going To Be Okay

Dear Gabby Gabrielle G.G. Gabs it-doesn’t-matter-because-your-name-doesn’t-define-you-like-you-think-it-does,

Slow down, but speed up.

You’re so overly concerned with the future that you’re not allowing anything to happen to prepare for it. You unintentionally took a year off to figure things out and all you have done is confuse yourself further. In fact, you’ve confused yourself so much that you’re now getting random tremors in your hands and passing out from stress, which is apparently a thing that can happen. I will say that it may not be a completely bad thing since you’re one step closer to getting actual answers, but just chill the heck out dude. You’re fine.

Your mind runs at a thousand miles a minute to the point where you don’t allow yourself to actually complete a single thought. I’ve never known anyone else who can overthink themselves to the point of not being able to think anymore, so let me remind you that your cool-as-a-cucumber exterior isn’t fooling anybody anymore. I don’t think it ever did. You’ve never been good at hiding your emotions. That’s okay. You’ve learned to accept it and are working on it. Go you.

You can officially say now that you’re in your twenties. You, an ever-contradictory kind of person, don’t know how to feel about that. Remember that you don’t have to feel anything specific. Your experiences are your own. Your life never feels as great as other’s appear. I get it: you’re unhappy with yourself. You suddenly despise your quiet nature as it continues to fail you the older you get. You now find yourself constantly wishing you were one of those naturally likable and fun people. We all know who they are even if we’ve never personally held a conversation with them. They’re easy-going, extroverted but never obnoxious, able to hold an intelligent conversation but also know how to make small talk like nobodies business, and usually attractive in a totally natural I-didn’t-even-try way. Us outsiders really want to be annoyed by them, and we often try, but we can’t bring ourselves to even dislike them a little bit as soon as one of them glances in our direction or says something nice to us because they’re just that damn likable. 

I’m sorry honey, but that’s not you.

Guess what? That’s okay! You’ll find people you mesh with. You’ve done it before, you can do it again. In the meantime, keep working on your social skills and stop hating yourself so much. Seriously, calm down. No one sees you with as much of a judgmental perspective as you do. Plus, you have your own attributes that even those abnormally likable people would be jealous of.

One day you might just wake up to realize you found a go-to group of friends that you can always hang out with without any pressure, just like you’ve been wanting. One day you will have to figure out where you’re going to live, but for now you have a home with your parents and that’s perfectly normal for several more years. One day you will get ahold of your love life. One day things might not go according to plan, you’re going to be thrown a few curve balls, but that’s life. Expect it, but don’t obsess over it because it’s going to happen either way. I don’t need to remind you to be cautious because I already know you will be.

Be a little less cautious, in fact. Let go. Breathe. Planning isn’t a bad thing, but find a good balance. Take life as it comes.

More than anything, hold firm to your faith in God. You might not know what you’re doing, but thank goodness He does.

Sincerely,

The part of you that knows happiness will not suddenly hit you; you have to find joy in every phase of life.

 

The Greatest Poem Ever Written

This is better than any birthday post I planned on making. Please read what my friend Steven wrote for me today. Seriously, I cried half from how funny it is and half from how sweet it is. This is probably the best birthday present I’ve ever gotten. Excuse me while I go read it to everyone I know. I have amazing friends!!! Go check out his blog while you’re at it because he writes about movies and music like I’ve never seen!

The Greatest Poem Ever Written

The Ranting SBox


Roses are red, Violets are blue,

This is my poem… Um… A-Choo!

View original post 379 more words

Falling, Then Flying

You can’t fall in love

Without first accepting the reality that you may be let down.

You can take precautionary measures before you jump

But at some point you have to simply fall and be okay with falling.

Not attached to a chord to pull you back up

Or with a parachute on your back in case it all goes wrong.

Love is hoping they will catch you

While knowing there’s a chance they won’t.

If you look before you jumped though

You will still fall, but soon you will learn to fly.

When you truly let go

They won’t need to catch you.

They will simply sprout wings of their own

Jumping, falling, and flying all the same.


 

Song: First Day Of My Life – Bright Eyes

 

Chances

She wonders, “When will it be my turn?”

To be loved truly,

To truly love in return,

To feel a little more whole,

To find solace in a best friend.

“When will it be my turn?” She asks again.

But there’s no reply.

And that’s all she needs to know.


 

Song: Lonely – The Maine

He Could Do Better.

“He could do better.”

Maybe he can; maybe you’re right. Maybe he’s the only one that doesn’t care about my defects; maybe I’m afraid that one day he’ll see me for what I am. Maybe I’m not enough; maybe I used to believe I was.

“He could do better.”

Is it the gaps in my teeth? Because I swear to get them fixed as soon as I find the money.   Is it the fact that my nails look tattered? Because I swear I will find a nervous habit besides biting them until they bleed. Is it the extra pounds that I carry? Because I swear I tried to skip dinner but wasn’t strong enough tonight.

“He could do better.”

Maybe it isn’t my unpleasant appearance; maybe he really can see past it all. Maybe he had to force himself see me as beautiful at first; maybe I don’t mind if he did. Maybe it’s deeper than that; maybe I’m worse than I thought.

“He could do better.”

Is it my shyness? Because I swear I’m doing my best to be heard. Is it that I’m not exciting enough? Because I swear I’m going to embrace breaking the rules right when I figure out how to stop caring so much. Is it the fact that sometimes I don’t want to be alive? Because I swear he makes me want to be.

He could do better.


 

Song: Pieces – Sum 41